Pussy Riot speelde afgelopen dinsdag in het Patronaat. Onze Joshua Baumgarten stond in het voorprogramma met zijn band The Irrational Library. Dus, schreef hij op geheel eigen wijze een artikel. En tja… een klein beetje afdwalen kan hierbij geen kwaad; hij is immers onze eigen Haarlemse Riot… 

Pussy Riot @ Haarlem

Sorry, a bit tired and worn out from last nights gig in the Patronaat with The Irrational Library in the voorprogramma for Pussy Riots performance of Riot Days.  Want more info about the book Riot Days van Maria Alyokhinas which their show was based upon then I recommend that you read the articles about it in the Volkskrant and the HD by Peter Bruyn. There is not much I can add about the who and the what right now.   I am a bit worn out and tired.

Pussy Riot @ Haarlem

 Pussy Riot might have Poetin to rail against but I got the fucking Action! Fuck the Action!

Pussy Riot @ Haarlem

It was a great night in the Patronaat. Though it all started for me that morning when I went to the Action to return a pair of shit Grondig headphones. Ok, I should know better by now than to buy anything besides a broodtrommel, bleach or blank white paper in the Action.  Anyhow I did and well I got what I paid for. That being said I was still naive enough to believe in customer service here in Holland.  So I went back to the Action on the Westergracht and calmly walked up to the customer service desk. The young woman behind the counter there greeted me pleasantly and asked how she could help me.  I said that I wanted to return a pair of headphones. When she asked me what was wrong with them I said that they just had horrible sound. She said that I could not return them due to hygiene reasons. That I had tried them, had them in my ears, so they were no longer clean. Sorry, sir. So…, I took a deep breath and replied: ”Look before I even start, please know that this not meant as a personal attack upon you as a person. But what the fuck? Doesn’t the company you work for know anything about customer service?”
“Sorry sir,” she continued. “But we just can’t resell them.
“I don’t expect you to resell them, I expect you to throw them in the garbage with all the other defective cheap crap that the Action sells and absorb the loss for selling shit products and just give me a refund or store credit, please.”  She smiled and said again: “Sorry we don’t do that.”
I said: “This company has a lot to learn from fucking Wal-Mart and Target!” She just smiled like a piece of jongen belegen and said “Sorry,” one last time. I repeated my statement about not taking it personally to her and then said thanks…(for what) and…have a nice day. Even in times of utter frustration I attempt to stay polite for some reason.

Pussy Riot @ Haarlem

When I got home my wife was sitting behind her laptop working. She asked me how the gym was and I started laughing. She asked: “What’s up?”  I said: “Pussy Riot might have Poetin to rail against but I got the fucking Action! Fuck the Action! Oh I am so ready for tonights show. I needed something to piss me off and get me in the mood.” My wife just shook her head and went back to her work. I ate some greek yogurt and blurred my mind with Facebook.

Pussy Riot @ Haarlem

Found out that cheers in Russian is not na zdarovje but something like davi, I don’t remember

That afternoon Pussy Riot was late tot heir soundcheck, so our soundcheck was cut short.  No dig deal. They seemed to be nice enough people though a bit to themselves. No real bonding moments backstage. (though at the end of the night I did share a shot of Jack with them. Found out that cheers in Russian is not na zdarovje but something like davi, I don’t remember. But I did teach them how to say proost. Look at me being oh so Dutch. More importantly we played a fucking great show.  If I may say so myself. I will leave my review of ourselves at that.

Pussy Riot @ Haarlem

Pussy Riot – Riot Days was an intense birage of theather, music, visuals, text and intention.  Having read the book Riot Days by Maria Alyokhinas which the show is based upon, their presentation delivered some hardcore visuals to what my imagination had already filled in.  This was no joke but in my eyes the real deal.
My wife bought T-shirts for us both. By the merch table I ended up getting boxed out of in front of my own band merch by all the other cultural consumer tourists. I love a good band T-shirt. A sign said that proceeds would go to help political prisoners. Which in Holland is one thing most bands don’t really have to be concerned about.

Pussy Riot @ Haarlem

And speaking about here in Holland and the DUTCH, WTF is up with it the increasingly growing number of people attending concerts nowadays who just stand there babbling on and on to one another why other people are trying to enjoy the show and the performers are doing their best to put on a fucking show. Jezus! Shut the fuck or just go upstairs, outside or please just stay at home. This Dutch Disease of talking through concerts and also having the nerve to be offended when another member of the public asks you to please stop. Seriously folks, this behavior is bullshit. I mean it’s not like you go to a movie and talk the whole way through. Or do you?

Pussy Riot @ Haarlem

Ah fuck these people. What do they have to worry about in their lives any way. Most of us have all that we want and more here. Entitled. Some woman actually yelled at a friend of mine during our show when he asked her and her friends to please stop talking so loud while standing right by the stage. Supposedly she said to him, “I don’t care, fuck them. They are men, they can handle it. They are just the openers.” This statement is just wrong, front to back. What sort of person attends a show from a socially conscious band like Pussy Riot and says something so demeaning to another person. Fucking cultural tourists, that’s who.

Pussy Riot @ Haarlem

Well, yeah…ok then that was that. I wasn’t bothered by any of the chatter while on stage.  And you know what, so it goes sometimes. No offense but the audience is secondary to me anyhow. The live show for me is about how we as a band give out all that we have put into creating something together.  If people get it, well great. If not, well then so it goes. Anyway for me and my bandmates it was great night.  For a majority of the public as well. Pussy Riot showed us all something and I think that we The Irrational Library got our point across too.  That if you can walk and chew gum at the same time, then you can also think and dance at the same time too.

And just to wrap it up here, the Action sells shit product and needs a course in customer service and I will probably be stupid and by some stupid shit from there again and…if anyone is interested in buying a pair of cheap headphones let me know. I only wore them once, for 30 seconds and by the way, my ears are super clean.  

That reminds me that I need to buy more q-tips.

Fotografie: Peter van Heun.

Meer Haerlems Bodem? Check hier het artikel over Kleuterkoning Napoleon

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